rambling

good googly moogly
you got me
and its crazy
ive let you go
in most scenarios
but there are certain calls
i wont ignore
like the call of chemistry
our bodies together
i swear its destiny
but i shouldnt swear
so i promise
you satisfy me
and i always want more
but you pacify me
from the bed to the floor
you floor me
and i know we wont be
but that is irrelevant
in the grand scheme
this thing we have
is outta sight
its unseen
i cannot grasp it
but its fantastic
i want you to go away
but keep that here
i want that to stay
its magnetic
i cant deny that
and judging from the fact
that you seem to come back
you arent blind to reality either
but how can we save this
and not do that too
we gotta stop
but i dont want to
i just want you
not crossing my mind
sometimes i just want to touch you
and be touched
ill be blind
but i wont be thinking
no nostalgic memories
no rushing to rest under another lover
who cant do it better
who cant make the letter
how can i bother
when i know that your there
when i know youre aware
that your the only brotha
that can make me square
because i know
that tonight
may be the night
and when that falls thru
i only anticipate our next flight
you match the bark with the bite
so how can i fight it
why should i even try it
im satisfied
i always want more
but for now im pacified
until the next time
its mutual
and im cool
i am
cuz id be a fool to let this go
not the feelings but the flow
the glow for days after
the dro like stupor
has me blazin
good googly moogly
its amazing

Ms. Cormier

Ive spent countless nights awake
trying to write a poem
that could encompass
your beauty
or your strength
or your love
ive seen the sun rise
and set
and rise again
and i am at a loss
for there are no real words
that can exemplify your excellence
and when they asked me
to write a poem for you
i may have even thought
it could be easy
you are my grandmother after all
and we had a bond
that transcended
phone calls
and visit
family gatherings
and meals that made us meet
but
i havent slept
only at times
i wasnt supposed to be sleeping
like at 11am
on thursday afternoon
and dreamt when i should be dreaming
like driving down the 110 N
and missing my exit on my way home
i cannot put your love grandma
into iambic pentameter
and your beauty into an ABAB or AABB rhythm pattern
i cannot
alliterate all the ways
you allowed me to alleviate the stresses of circumstance
with your always present never selfish love
and even coltrane cant calm me
my mind goes a mile aminute
like his sax on most records
no order
no reason
just you
how do I write a poem
about a woman
who's attributes
cant be explained
in words found in the dictionary
believe me
ive looked
no words to emcompass
the strength you possessed
my heart is full
but my brain is empty
and when my heart is empty
my brain is
full of nothing
i cant win
i am now missing
another piece
of the puzzle that makes me
we said prayers at my bedside
slipped me lemon drops
among the very pews
we sat to mourn her loss
taught me the prayers
so i could say them with you
i was
grandmothers baby
and as i got older
that seemed to escape me
but during the hardest times
you listened
while i cried
im not gonna lie
i thought i had time
to reminisce with you
not about you
but here we are
and what can i say?
What can I really say
to show you
that you meant the world to me
how can words
speak the language of my heart
even the rosetta stone
couldnt decipher that part
How can i fit you
into Iambic Pentameter?
How can I confine you
in an ABAB or AABB?
When you were prose to me
Because the lines
dont always rhyme
but they work
and this has to be
the hardest thing ive written
because it hurts
all I can say is
there is nothing like
a mothers love
so a grandmothers love
must be that squared
and even though
i wasnt at all prepared
im glad you were ever there
I love you

love purgatory: no more questions

we have reached the end of the road
and boyz II men is not singing
because i do not belong to you
nor you to me
we were
having fun
at some point
i remember
there were times
when I didnt have to wonder
and whether youre aware
i didnt really care
but somewhere along the line
we did a 180
you turned yeses
into maybes
and questions into crazy
and while you were never punctual
you werent full of bull
and that i could appreciate
we turned lust into love
and we could have done without
smiles into frowns
made moutains out of mounds
we let our feet leave the ground
and now
we fucked up
see
i told myself previously
no sad love poems
no, "i dont feel pretty's"
no, "im not good enoughs"
no, "how could you run out on our loves?"
but presently
i feel all those things
and i could do without
believe me
you know me
i think
but regardless of my feelings
i gotta keep going
because i said
i wouldnt write any sad love poems about you
said these emotions wouldnt control me
even though they kinda do
shit i was in love purgatory
waist deep
and you refused to dip your feet
and that 180 became 360
but that extra 180 became me
and i couldnt deal
with starting from the beginning
i still cant imagine that you would wanna leave me
but
what
can
i
do?
move
thats it
forget
quit
and get on with it
we have come
to the end of the road
and no
ill never let go
but i am
going on....

love purgatory

something is just not right
you are not the one for me
but you captivate every brain cell
you activate every nerve in my system
and though im not nervous around you
i should be
because you have the power
to crush me
like
me ant
you giant
i never stood a chance
but i never stood the stance
that signaled WARNING
no bullshit within 50 feet
somehow i let you reach me
the physical is what keeps me
but your mystery is what intrigues me
makes me want more
than your body beneath me
but im reaching
your enigma is predictable
your reasoning is political
even more reason to believe that you are full of bull
but even that does not pull me away
in fact
you draw me so close
theres no space to fit
the one thats supposed to replace you
his only intention is to meet me
im annoyed that its not you im speaking to
honestly
these niggas aint shit to me
you included
but like an anomaly
still you are secluded
and though your purpose alludes me
i cant get over what you do to me
i STILL cant tell you not to stop
before you keep going
and its only getting better
i try to keep it dry
but you only make it wetter
i just dont get it
i just cant hit that nail on the head
pin the tail on you donkey
one night with you
im singing songs the next morning
still spent
but i keep up with your cycle
and when i picture it
we are each others
reduce
reuse
recycle
because
there is no end
we have not reached a zenith
there wont be one reached
but we will continue
on this path to no where
because theres parts of our lives we share
and parts of our lives we keep
theres between the sheets
and the time in between
these answers we seek
but in these questions we steep
we
are
stuck
in love purgatory
while your testing the water with you finger
i got one leg in
because i only figure
i know how to swim
and im watching you unsure
while im wading in the shore
and still my heart is yours
so i say
something is not right
you are not the one for me
and i am not the one for you
but somehow
we continue